Dizzy’s Cover Letter for His Application to Harvard

Academia

Jul 19

Dear Harvard,

Hello!

I hope this cover letter finds you well.

This is probably a long shot, but may I attend your school? As a student?

Full disclosure: I am not a “legacy,” as a guy named Pete just explained to me. I don’t have great grades, and I only speak English. Math confuses me. I’m not good at sports, and I used ChatGPT to write (most of) this. BUT my main extracurricular activity is selling photos of my ass on OnlyFans, so I have a LOT of money. I would like to use this money to expand my mind, and I will pay you more than the typical student because I can afford it. (Wink.)

This means a lot to me, and I promise to study and be a good student.

Looking forward to hearing from you, and I’ll keep my fingers crossed in the meantime! 🤞

Sincerely,

Robert McEvily is a writer and multidisciplinary creative who publishes short fiction, humor, essays, cultural commentary, drawings, photography, and video.

He’s the Creator and Editor of Six Sentences (Est. 2006), and hopes you’ll share your work.

Robert McEvily

Robert McEvily is a writer and multidisciplinary creative who publishes short fiction, humor, essays, cultural commentary, drawings, photography, and video. He’s the Creator and Editor of Six Sentences (Est. 2006), and hopes you’ll share your work.

https://www.robertmcevily.com/

Dizzy’s Cover Letter for His Application to Harvard

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